The Dirty Carols are....
Some say she worked as an international spy. Others say she worked in IT. Whatever her background, we know that Eliz is a little too handy with a camera and keeps the other Dirties in line with her attention to detail and a work ethic that makes Thomas Edison look like a total waster.
Lorna is a thwarted fine artist whose resentment of other fine artists is inversely proportional to the effort she puts in to doing any art. Living in hippy squalor, Comet Lorna sheds a trail of old fag ends, joss sticks and tie-dye knickers on each trip to the fridge for another wee drinkie. Lorna is clever at painting and will dab you with gilt if you don’t run fast enough.
Rejecting a multitude of proper jobs, Louise spends her days conserving her energy, writing unpleasant poetry and lists that start with things like “If I had a pack of magic bears, I would…..”. Louise is not bad at writing funny lyrics and she enjoys a lovely sprint. She was once nicknamed “The Rocket.”
Sandrine was just six weeks old when we found her under a Waitrose shopping trolley and we’ve raised her as our own. She’s grown up to be a bonny, strong lass with an unnatural penchant for bouncy castles and, inexplicably, a French accent.